Hello (I am back in America) Everyone!
This is my "Living London" Reflection blog. Though I have a lot to say (type), I know I will be in a constant state of reflection regarding my time in London. It all feels so fresh in my mind. My time in London has effected me greatly (all for the better) but I know the truest impact(s) the experience has had on me will be the result of the goings on of the rest of my life. I do not mean to make such a grandiose statement sound vague...I only mean I know my experience of "Living London" will be with me and impact me for the rest of my life. Knowing my time in London was truly a "once in a lifetime experience" it seems right that such an experience will always be with me - somewhere in the back of my head. In realizing the true sense of the longevity this experience has and will have on me is probably the explanation as to why I am entering this reflection post on the date that marks the fact that I have been home for two months. Two months already - that's over half the amount of time I spent in London. I'm sure many of you (as I had promised) were expecting this post within two weeks of me being back, but today just feels right as many things in my life are coming together and I am truly coming to terms with the magnitude of what I actually did. What I did, simply was: study and live in London for three months. What I did, not so simply: can not be put into words.
Besides, how was I suppose to blog when I wasn't in my normal "blogging place" - Starbucks, Cafe Nero, or my room at 21 Pembridge Gardens in Notting Hill - not typing about London in those places - didn't feel right. Would I even know what to blog about? What did I have to tell or show or share or explain. For a writer, being in the same time and place when writing does help - a lot. And if I'm truly honest - two weeks after being home - I still felt like I was in London. Still wanted to go jump on the tube or plan the next weekend's trip. I still feel that way at times. All this and the mere fact that London has become inescapable....between Queen Elizabeth II's Diamond Jubilee, the Olympics quickly approaching, and the ever probing question of great world concern "When will William and Catherine have a baby?" (seriously world, leave them alone)......I feel I've seen as much of London in the past couple weeks as I did when I was there (figuratively, of course). While it was great to be home, it was still so surreal. Which leads me to my first "London Lesson."(Side Note: It was also terribly sad and confusing that no one seemed to appreciate or respond to my farewell of "Cheers" everywhere I went when I got home....Americans.....)
"London Lesson" #1: There is no one word you can use, nor 1,000,000, nor any amount, that could ever explain what Living London was like.
The number one question I have been asked since being home has been, the default question, "How was it?"
After countless times of this question being answered with, "incredible, wonderful, amazing" seemed so.....expected....so weak....so not true. Yes, my time in London was all those things but it was so much more than that. I found myself later going, "It was incredible but I don't know if that's the right word. There are no right words. I don't know if I'll ever be able to articulate it." And I know I never will be able to. If I was talking to someone I knew had read my blog, or knew of it, I'd say, "read the blog - it's all in there." And for lack of a better form of expression - it is. I wanted my blog to convey the sense that anyone that read it felt that they were "right there next to me" through it all. Because you all were. It was your support and love that kept me moving forward, helped me know I could do it. I mean that with all sincerity. Besides, I felt it was the least I could do - share my experience. The Internet, and ever increasing and expanding mediums of communication amongst anyone and everyone on the planet, keeping a blog felt natural. Being able to skype family and friends was amazing. Often my London friends and I would talk...about what it must have been like to go abroad ten, even five, years ago....because those kids truly - went abroad. Aside from postcards, letters, a brief (and expensive) phone call here or there, maybe, maybe, maybe e-mail.....there was no other way for them to communicate with friends and family. So in a way communicating with you all through this blog (or skyping with you) made it feel like I wasn't really away. I felt safe. (And I could only fit so many words on the post cards I sent). Though I still have my qualms about the Internet and technology and the way it is destroying the innate communication skills among all of us, it is still a wonderful gift. And let's be honest and frank, I owed this blog to my parents. After all the stress and anxiety I put them through in preparing to go abroad - literal panic attacks and breakdowns that I had - it was the least I could. One of my friends abroad said it best when he/she said, "the one thing missing to make this perfect is if all my friends and family could be here, literally going through this with me." I agree. And that is why I thought of this blog as that missing part - that you were all there with me. But for the 20 odd some kids that I lived with - we were there together. Reality was that, at the end of the day, we had each other. And for the few good friends I made in London (you know who you are), I will be forever grateful. Which leads me to London Lesson #2.......
"London Lesson #2": Value people, value time, value friendship. Only an experience like being abroad can bring you together with people from all over the country and all over the world in such a way. For three months we were together 24/7. And though there were the common issues and problems in living together with many new, different people....we share a bond that is unexplainable and can not be understood by anyone else. I can now say I have friends all over the country (and two from a mythical land called "Minnesota." ;). haha.). It such an extraordinary thing. We're trying to find time to have a reunion state side and already planning that ten year reunion back in London.....
On the same token, these relationships, and our time in London, have made me reflect on my the relationships/friendships I've had here at home for years (as I suppose any "once in a lifetime" experience would). Trying to explain my time in London to my cousin and my best friends proved challenging. While I knew my cousin could relate because she had been abroad, none of other best friends really could. This made me feel guilty. For as much as I wanted my blog to have them "right there next to me" - in reality - they weren't. And as much as I wanted to talk about London, I wanted to hold back. One of the points of the "reverse culture shock" pamphlet we were given by SJU when we went abroad said friends and family, after a while, are "not going to want to hear about it." They weren't there so how could I truly expect them to be fully engaged or understand or even care. It's a tricky thing. I know many of my friends would loved an abroad experience if they could have done it. I wanted to help them have the chance the best way I could with this blog, in the hopes they could feel apart of it.
And that is why I know the friendships I have made in London are ones I will have for the rest of my life. Of course, Marisa and I were friends before London - now we're just closer friends, and Beth, Marisa and I knew each other - now we have a serious room mate bond - haha. But now I have Laura, Julie, Audra, Phil, Jake, Kyle, Liz, Kate and the rest of you lot. Thank you all so much for extending your friendship to me. I can't imagine having gone through "Living London" with any other group of people. Besides, we all love the texts, tweets, and facebook statuses - right?! Yeah, thought so. Oh yes, and WELCOME HOME to AUDRA! She's the last lassie to join us back state side.
"London Lesson #3": Seize every opportunity, never regret, live your own life, and have love at the center of it all...... It might sound far-reaching but I guess the writer is coming out in me. But it is all true. This summer I will be working close to 40 hours a week, working a few hours a week at my internship, reading, writing, and hanging out with my friends (we are all almost 21 now!!!) :). My time in London has given me the confidence to know I can do anything. Time abroad does mature you in a way you don't even realize (since I have gotten home....people say I look more mature, have this "sense" of maturity.....okay, everyone). Thank you for that. I do feel a sense of independence I have never felt before. I wanna go travel anywhere and everywhere. Do anything. London has helped me feel this way. There's just that small problem of - money. And though I feel as though 21 Pembridge Gardens was a little bubble - (a posh bubble) - many things were taken care of that we didn't have to worry about - like helping us get use to the Tube, etc. - we basically did most of it on our own. To those of my friends who were abroad and really had to rough it - you Roma ladies - I salute you.
Basically, this is everything I have been thinking these past two months. I'm sure the Olympics will bring up a lot of the same memories and emotions. I know this "reflection" will continue for the rest of life. But I also wanted to do one more post to truly say thank you: to my parents, my brother, my family, friends, London loves, and especially London. I am a different person because of you all. Thank you to my loyal readers. Thank you to everyone who stuck by me...
But do not fret readers, since I've enjoyed this blogging thing so much I think I'm gonna start a new one about my life since being home.......don't worry you'll know if I do.
From my flight touching down at Newark, to being surprised by my sobbing Grandmother at the airport, to going Chickie's and Pete's right from the airport.........it's been amazing to be home.
In the immediate future let's make "The Summer I turned 21" the best summer ever! I'm still writing and reading (50 Shades of Grey has proved to be it's own British/American humorous experience for me) and experiencing life.
NEXT GOAL: To apply and be accepted (positive thinking) into the Disney College Program. Can you imagine how MAGICAL (no, not you HP) a "LIVING DISNEY" blog would be?!
Off to the next blog......
CHEERS, (cuz I can).
MK <3
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